A Mom's Open Letter to LGBTQ+ Activist Friends

The following letter is from a mom in our church who has sought to be faithful to raise her children in the fear and instruction of the Lord. Yet some of those children have wandered into the darkness of sexual identity sins. She has tried to love them through it while remaining faithful to God’s holy standards, which has caused her much grief from a culture set against Christ.

These are the longings of a mom who loves her children and wants for them (and all of us) the greatest joys God offers in this life and the next.

If you have struggled with sexual identity questions or have someone in your life that you desire to help, please contact us and we can connect you with people like this mom to walk this narrow path with you.

Dear LGBTQ Activists,

Thank you for the work you have done in bringing forth the awareness that people in this  community are beautiful people, worthy of our love and acceptance. Thank you for making us aware of the many horrendous ways they have suffered and been ill treated. Thank you for the many occasions where you have made way for shelter and providing a safe place for them to take the suffering and pain that has gone with identifying as a member of the LGBTQ community.  Thank you for taking the time to sit with me and help me obtain a better understanding of what our children are facing.

I understand that your movement advocates for LGBTQ people and I was wondering, if this group of letters represents people who are facing persecution for their identity, could you add a “C” to the list? We too have faced rejection as those who take on a new identity, not in our sexuality but in Christ.

The most difficult thing for me is that I have been labeled “unsafe”.


I was labeled unsafe even though I lovingly embraced my child with thankfulness when they finally shared what had taken years of struggle to share. I will never forget seeing the agony during those late, long hours sitting on the sofa as I allowed space to talk. Our child found it difficult to communicate simple things, let alone what we now know to be gender dysphoria.

I was labeled unsafe even though we made every effort to continue to financially support our child’s education, provide housing, taking them shopping and having weekly gatherings with the family for ice cream, ending each visit with a big hug.

I was labeled unsafe because I asked questions. It didn’t matter that I did carefully and with as much sensitivity as I could in order to gain an understanding of the struggle. (Resources were few at this time, this being before Caitlin Jenner’s story brought forth a flood of articles, books, and blogs.)

I was labeled unsafe even though we made every effort not to use the name we gave our child, special to us because it was the name of my grandfather who passed on the day our first child was born.

I was labeled unsafe because I would not pay for an endocrinologist’s bill since the doctor did not test our child for my husband’s clotting disorder which could have deadly consequences if hormones were given.

I was labeled unsafe because we did not support transitioning. This decision was not only because we felt there were ethical reasons but my research revealed that surgically altering the body would not relieve the gender dysphoria, though it might give some temporary relief.

I was labeled so unsafe that someone provided the way to whisk our child off to Seattle, Washington, with no notice and no contact since that day.

I am considered unsafe even though we continue to lovingly welcome people from this community into our home.

Please consider that we all struggle with our identities. Praise God that the gospel calls us to an identity that is more magnificent than we can ever imagine. “ Surely he has borne our griefs and carried our sorrows; yet we esteemed him stricken, smitten by God, and afflicted. But he was pierced for our transgressions; he was crushed for our iniquities; upon him was the chastisement that brought us peace, and with his wounds we are healed. All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned - every one - to his own way; and the Lord has laid on him the iniquity of us all. (Isaiah 53:4-6)

I pray that you come to see that our identity can be found as image bearers of God rather than in our sexuality. “So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them.” (Genesis 1:27)



One who wishes all would find their true identity in Christ